


I'm Only a Heartbeat Away

by ddelusionall



Category: DBSK | Tohoshinki | TVfXQ | TVXQ, JYJ (Band)
Genre: Bad Decisions, Bars and Pubs, Dancing, Drinking, Implied Sexual Content, Literal Sleeping Together, M/M, Post-Lawsuit Era (DBSK), probably
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-09-16
Updated: 2012-09-16
Packaged: 2021-03-02 04:06:44
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,812
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23928871
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ddelusionall/pseuds/ddelusionall
Summary: Jaejoong drinks to forget. Yunho is so much better at making him forget than alcohol.
Relationships: Jung Yunho (DBSK)/Kim Jaejoong
Kudos: 3





	I'm Only a Heartbeat Away

**Author's Note:**

> I am importing my stories from LiveJournal. The original fic can be found [here](http://be-ddelusionall.livejournal.com/).
> 
> I haven't read this story in a long time, so I may have missed some tags. Just let me know if I did.

Jaejoong wondered how many tiny glasses of strong alcohol he’d already had and decided it didn’t matter. If he still knew he was drinking, and still knew he was sitting at a bar, and still knew the bartender was giving him concerned looks, then he hadn’t had enough of them. He tilted the shot back and swallowed it, dropping the glass back to the bar with a clink. Another replaced it.

A shoulder jostled him.

Jaejoong ignored it and sipped half of the next shot down.

“Maybe you should slow down,” a warm voice whispered.

Warm, deep, accented.

“Maybe you should go away,” Jaejoong said, letting his own accent slip into the rebuttal.

Yunho chuckled. Sometimes the two of them talked like this just to confuse everyone around them.

Yunho reached over and took the glass from Jaejoong’s hand and Jaejoong protested. Yunho knocked the rest of it back.

“What are you doing here?” Jaejoong asked.

Yunho smiled and signaled for another drink. He didn’t say anything, but drank half of the shot and held the rest out for Jaejoong.

Jaejoong took his wrist, placed his lips on the edge of the glass and opened his mouth. Yunho tilted the alcohol into his mouth. Yunho’s other hand lifted to his head, fingers running through his hair. Jaejoong almost choked on the drink, but managed to swallow and then tilted his head back, into Yunho’s touch.

They shared another shot before Yunho answered his question.

“Nothing nefarious,” he said, and Jaejoong was lost for a moment before he continued. “Just came to get a drink and saw you here.”

Jaejoong smiled. “Changmin-ah?”

“He’s at home, nose in a book. He didn’t feel like coming out. And the other parts of your soul?”

Jaejoong winced at the tone, even though he was sure that Yunho hadn’t meant to sound so pissed. “Yoochun is in China, and Junsu is with his brother.”

Yunho nodded. “Can you settle your tab?”

“I don’t want to,” Jaejoong said, turning away from him. He downed another shot.

“You’re going to give yourself alcohol poisoning.”

“Again.”

Yunho sighed.

“You’re not my leader anymore.”

Jaejoong heard Yunho’s breath catch and winced.

\--- _You’ll always be my leader, no matter what. No matter where we are or what we’re doing. Don’t fucking forget that._

_I won’t forget how selfish you’re being._

_I’m not being selfish for wanting to be treated fairly. You’re like their dog, come and go when called. Tricks. Do this and that. Drag Changmin into it._

_It’s called honor. I wouldn’t expect you to know what that is._ \---

Jaejoong still sometimes felt the sting of that slap on his palm. It didn’t help that they had to perform as five for the last time the day after.

A heavy hand landed on his shoulder and Jaejoong sighed and leaned into his body. He muttered an apology that he wasn’t sure Yunho heard.

“Come on. Let me take you home.”

“We are not going out in public together. Are you crazy?”

“You care?”

“Only for you,” Jaejoong said and tilted his head up. “You’ll get in trouble.”

“Yeah, I will.”

Jaejoong shut his eyes and took a deep breath.

Lips touched his softly and Jaejoong whimpered. His hand lifted and tangled in Yunho’s hair, mouth opening. Forgetting. Forgetting. Forgetting. The kiss did what the alcohol couldn’t and Jaejoong finally felt intoxicated.

A throat cleared, and Yunho broke away. Jaejoong kept his eyes shut and buried his face in Yunho’s neck.

Yunho smiled and told the bartender to put Jaejoong’s drinks on his card and then pulled the beauty off the bar stool.

“Yunho-ah,” Jaejoong protested as he was led toward the back.

Yunho put his arm around Jaejoong firmly. “You can’t change my mind.”

“I never could,” Jaejoong mumbled. He put one arm around Yunho’s back, the other around his front, under his jacket. The back alley was blessedly silent and cool. Jaejoong hadn’t had enough to drink. His feet stumbled on the concrete anyway.

After five minutes of walking, Jaejoong was almost able to think they were normal. They weren’t huge stars and the talk of the entertainment industry. Lovers. Normal lovers.

Jaejoong buried his face in Yunho’s shoulder again.

Yunho stopped in a dark, shadowed part of the alley, against a brick wall. A small bit of darkness, and their lips met again. Yunho’s hands slipped into the back pockets of Jaejoong’s jeans. Pulling their bodies closer. Jaejoong clutched at his t-shirt, following the dance of tongues as best he could.

\--- _Kiss me._

_No._

_Just kiss me. You know you want to._

_I’m not going to kiss you. We’re fighting, remember?_

_My fight is with SM, not you. It was never with you. Kiss me._

_If I kiss you now, I’m not going to want to stop._

_I know._ \---

Yunho broke away from him and pressed their foreheads together. In a voice thick with emotion, he sang, “I’m only a heartbeat away”, and Jaejoong’s heart clenched.

“Don’t, please.”

Yunho smiled. “I love you, Boo.”

“I love you, too, Yunnie, god. I love you.”

Yunho kissed him again, and Jaejoong thanked him silently for ignoring the tears that eventually turned it salty and painful.

Jaejoong didn’t fight him again when he pulled them down the alley. He hid his face as he slipped into the passenger side of a car he didn’t recognize.

“It’s a rental,” Yunho said in explanation as he pulled out. “I’ve been driving them a lot lately. It keeps me from being followed as much.”

Jaejoong nodded. He was worried about the fangirls parked outside of his house, all the time, but the windows were dark, tinted, and they wouldn’t be able to see him in the garage.

Yunho drove silently. Their hands joined over the middle console.

Jaejoong watched his profile. Thinking. Trying not to think.

A few more shots and he wouldn’t have remembered the night. He wasn’t sure which was better.

Yunho pulled into the garage and the door shut, and Jaejoong led him through the empty, too-big house. JiJi was there in a moment to rub against Yunho’s legs, and Yunho chuckled and picked him up.

“Traitor,” Jaejoong muttered.

“Me or the cat?” Yunho asked.

Jaejoong stopped and turned. Their eyes met. It was too important of a question to answer, or to not answer.

Jaejoong grinned. “The cat. You did what you thought was right. He’s just selfish.”

Yunho set JiJi on the ground and held his arms open.

Jaejoong paused for only a moment and walked to him, hands easily sliding around Yunho’s waist where they belonged.

“Do you want me to stay?”

Jaejoong kissed him instead of answering. A touch of lips. A brush of a tongue. It would have been easy to drag him to the bedroom. He walked backwards to the kitchen. He left Yunho by the table and went to the fridge and the Soju.

“I thought you had enough,” Yunho said.

“You always think that,” Jaejoong said and downed a harsh swallow of the alcohol. He tossed a bottle to Yunho, and was thankful the other caught it.

Yunho sighed and opened it.

Jaejoong sat next to him and their fingers entwined, other hands clenched around cold glass.

They drank in silence for a little while.

“You’re so beautiful, Boo,” Yunho suddenly said.

Jaejoong smiled. “So are you. Handsome.”

Yunho returned the smile, and shook his head. “I don’t mean that … I don’t know. I know you don’t think you’re attractive, but over a million Cassiopeia all over the world can’t be wrong about that.”

Jaejoong made a face and pouted.

“Your soul is beautiful,” Yunho said and touched Jaejoong’s cheek with a cold hand. “Your heart is beautiful and your … you are beautiful.”

Jaejoong turned away from the praise and shook his head. He finished his bottle of Soju and went for another one.

Yunho caught his wrist, and pulled Jaejoong off his chair and into his lap. Jaejoong thought of protesting and then didn’t, just settling on Yunho’s strong thighs, lips together. The chair squeaked under their weight. They were going to fall off of it. Jaejoong didn’t care too much. Their tongues fell into a familiar twist. A harsh need. And Jaejoong focused on the shuddering muscles under him.

“You are beautiful, too,” Jaejoong whispered.

They ended up half-naked on the floor, and then twisted together on the sofa, hands remembering the sensitive spots: Yunho’s stomach and hips, Jaejoong’s inner thighs and shoulders.

Drunk on pleasure. Drunk on each other.

Yunho still kissed him the same way, still held behind his knee the same way and rolled his hips the same way, pulling the same whimpering noise from Jaejoong’s throat, making him arch his back off the couch in the same way and leave the same imprint of nails on Yunho’s chest the same way.

Their breathing still wavered and steadied and twisted together, calming down, skin cooling, come dripping from their bodies in the same way.

It wasn’t the same as when they were eighteen. But nothing would ever be the same as when they were eighteen. Less frantic, less awkward. More powerful. More emotional.

Less permanent.

“I love you,” Yunho said.

Jaejoong nodded, and managed to gasp it back.

Yunho smiled and their lips met and his hips moved and any thought of sleeping before dawn flew from Jaejoong’s mind. His hooked his arms around Yunho’s neck, tightened his leg around his waist and let Yunho do what the alcohol was supposed to do.

Forget, just for the night, until morning.

Morning still came a little too soon.

Jaejoong watched the sunrise a lot these days, but when his eyes opened, light flooded his bedroom, and a strong, tanned arm was thrown across his stomach, his head nestled against the other arm, and he smiled and pushed his body deeper into Yunho’s warmth.

Yunho’s phone was on the nightstand, the message light blinking, and Jaejoong had a feeling that he was late for something.

He should have woken Yunho up.

Yunho made a sleepy noise and his arms tightened.

Jaejoong sighed at the inevitable.

“What time is it?” Yunho asked, voice rough with sleep.

Jaejoong swallowed. “Almost nine.”

“Fuck.”

Jaejoong stiffened, and waited, and then turned his head, and met Yunho’s amused gaze. “What?”

“You want me to leave.”

It wasn’t a question. And Jaejoong glared at him with his famous pout firmly in place. “You should leave.”

“Yes.” His eyes shut and he tightened his hold around Jaejoong’s stomach.

Jaejoong waited again, and then his eyes widened when he realized that Yunho had fallen back to sleep.

He didn’t know what to make of that. He turned back and watched Yunho’s phone light up and ring silently. Yunho’s arms tightened around him, and Jaejoong shut his eyes, and listened to Yunho’s soft breath, heart beating at the same rhythm.


End file.
